Tuesday, November 2, 2021

Begin

Begin again to the summoning birds
to the sight of the light at the window,
begin to the roar of morning traffic
all along Pembroke Road.
Every beginning is a promise
born in light and dying in dark
determination and exaltation of springtime
flowering the way to work.
Begin to the pageant of queuing girls
the arrogant loneliness of swans in the canal
bridges linking the past and future
old friends passing though with us still.
Begin to the loneliness that cannot end
since it perhaps is what makes us begin,
begin to wonder at unknown faces
at crying birds in the sudden rain
at branches stark in the willing sunlight
at seagulls foraging for bread
at couples sharing a sunny secret
alone together while making good.
Though we live in a world that dreams of ending
that always seems about to give in
something that will not acknowledge conclusion
insists that we forever begin.

— From The Essential Brendan Kennelly

Merit

Why me? What did I do
to deserve this?
A blue September sky
and the scent of late-blooming 
honeysuckle and roses,
the maple just starting 
to flash red and --who knew--
a second crop of raspberries
starting to ripen on the vine.
What have I ever done that merits
the generosity of rain
and the way the world opens 
into green? I mean, I have tried 
to be kind, but not like the 
cherry tomatoes, blushing
and turning sweet and 
giving themselves away 
by the handful.  Of course
I don't deserve this, any more
than you deserve fire or flood 
or sickness or heartache. There is no
math for this, no equation
that balances the equal sign.
Only this outpouring 
of all that is, the waterfall
we stand under, and drink from,
and try not to drown.

--Lynn Ungar

Watching My Friend Pretend Her Heart Isn’t Breaking

On Earth, just a teaspoon of neutron star
would weigh six billion tons. Six billion tons.
The equivalent weight of how much railway
it would take to get a third of the way to the sun.
It’s the collective weight of every animal
on earth. Times three.
Six billion tons sounds impossible
until I consider how it is to swallow grief—
just a teaspoon and one might as well have consumed
a neutron star. How dense it is,
how it carries inside it the memory of collapse.
How difficult it is to move then.
How impossible to believe that anything
could lift that weight.
There are many reasons to treat each other
with great tenderness. One is
the sheer miracle that we are here together
on a planet surrounded by dying stars.
One is that we cannot see what
anyone else has swallowed.

— Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer

Savasana

Once again, the field rehearses how to die.
Some of the grass turns golden first. Some
simply fades into brown. Just this morning,
I, too, lay in corpse pose, practicing
how to let myself be totally held by the earth
without striving, how to meet the day
without rushing off to do the next necessary
or beautiful thing. Soon, the grass will bend
or break, molder or disintegrate. Every year,
the same lesson in how to join
the darkness, how to be unmade, how quietly
we might lean into the uncertainty
of whatever comes next.

~ Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer

Love, Love

If sorrow is how we learn to love,
then let us learn.
Already enough sorrow’s been sown
for whole continents to erupt
into astonishing tenderness.
Let us learn. Let compassion grow rampant,
like sunflowers along the highway.
Let each act of kindness replant itself
into acres and acres of widespread devotion.
Let us choose love as if our lives depend on it.
The sorrow is great. Let us learn to love greater—
riotous love, expansive love,
love so rooted, so common
we almost forget
the world could look any other way.

~Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer


Gratitude

Gratitude, it happens,
needs less room to grow
than one might think—
is able to find purchase
on even the slenderest
of ledges, is able
to seed itself
in even the poorest of soils.
Just today, I marveled
as a small gratitude
took root
in the desert of me—
like a juniper tree
growing out of red rock.
If I hadn’t felt it myself,
I might not
have believed it—
but it’s true,
one small thankfulness
can slip into an arid despair
and with it comes
a change in the inner landscape,
the scent of evergreen. 

-- Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer

Gift

            I’m sure there’s a blossom in here somewhere

And if all I can give you is silence,
then let it be the most beautiful silence,
a silence perfumed with mint and sage,
a silence that brings a quiet shine
to everything it touches.
Let it be the kind of silence
that opens into a deeper silence,
the kind that knows golden petals and sunshine
and the scent of rain unfolding in the meadow—
a silence that holds you so lightly,
the way candlelight might hold you 
inside the dark. May it find you
in the morning, be waiting for you
before you rise. May you find it behind
and between every word you say,
the way sky supports the dark cursive 
of starlings. And may you hear it, really hear it,
the deep silence. Like your favorite
song playing over and over again.

-    Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer (2020)

Monday, November 1, 2021

 "I have found that among its other benefits, giving liberates the soul of the giver." -- Maya Angelou

Saturday, October 30, 2021

A Speech at the Lost and Found

I lost a few goddesses on my way from south to north,
as well as many gods on my way from east to west.
Some stars went out on me for good: part for me, O sky.
Island after island collapsed into the sea on me.
I’m not sure exactly where I left my claws,
who wears my fur, who dwells in my shell.
My siblings died out when I crawled onto land
and only a tiny bone in me marks the anniversary.
I jumped out of my skin, squandered vertebrae and legs,
and lost my senses many many times.
Long ago I closed my third eye to it all,
waved it off with my fins, shrugged my branches.
Scattered by the four winds to a place that time forgot,
how little there remains of me surprises me a lot,
a singular being of human kind for now,
who lost her umbrella in a tram somehow.

--Wislawa Szymborska, translated by Joanna Trzeciak

What Can I Say

What can I say that I have not said before?
So I'll say it again.
The leaf has a song in it.
Stone is the face of patience.
Inside the river there is an unfinishable story
and you are somewhere in it
and it will never end until all ends.
Take your busy heart to the art museum and the
chamber of commerce
but take it also to the forest.
The song you heard singing in the leaf when you
were a child
is singing still.
I am of years lived, so far, seventy-four,
and the leaf is singing still.

--Mary Oliver, from Swan

Wednesday, October 27, 2021

The Joins

What's between us
seems flexible as the webbing
between forefinger and thumb.

Seems flexible but isn't;
what's between us
is made of clay

like any cup on the shelf.
It shatters easily. Repair
becomes the task.

We glue the wounded edges
with tentative fingers.
Scar tissue is visible history

and the cup is precious to us
because
we saved it.

In the art of kintsugi
a potter repairing a broken cup
would sprinkle the resin

with powdered gold.
Sometimes the joins
are so exquisite

they say the potter
may have broken the cup
just so he could mend it.

--Chana Block


Sunday, October 24, 2021

 The water in your body is just visiting. It was a thunderstorm a week ago. It will be the ocean soon enough. Most of your cells come and go like morning dew. We are more weather pattern than stone monument. Sunlight on mist. Summer lightning. Your choices outweigh your substance.


https://twitter.com/cryptonature/status/1038534797105291265?lang=en 

Today It Occurs To Me

Not all journeys require leaving the house.
  Just this morning, I followed the hummingbird
    as it circled the feeder, then flew to the flowerbed
      and slipped its long beak into red nasturtiums.
And last night I wandered the garden rows,
  pulling long carrots and thick round beets,
    attending to the slow journey of ripening.
And all summer I follow the thin trail of loss,
  how it leads me from one sorrow to another
    my heart breaking open and then more open
      then impossibly more open.
And all this sheltered summer, I navigate moments of beauty—
  when I laugh at dinner until I fall off my chair,
    mornings when the river runs startlingly clear,
      the blue of larkspur, double rainbow over the drive,
        the tender silence inside the shouting—
          follow these moments like cairns in the wilderness,
            that lead always to exactly where I am.

-Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer

 “…one must say Yes to life and embrace it whenever it is found — and it is found in terrible places; nevertheless, there it is…

…For nothing is fixed, forever and forever and forever, it is not fixed; the earth is always shifting, the light is always changing, the sea does not cease to grind down rock. Generations do not cease to be born, and we are responsible to them because we are the only witnesses they have.

The sea rises, the light fails, lovers cling to each other, and children cling to us. The moment we cease to hold each other, the moment we break faith with one another, the sea engulfs us and the light goes out.”

James Baldwin ~ “The Fire Next Time” (1963)


A Prayer Among Friends

Among other wonders of our lives, we are alive
with one another, we walk here
in the light of this unlikely world
that isn't ours for long.
May we spend generously
the time we are given.
May we enact our responsibilities
as thoroughly as we enjoy
our pleasures. May we see with clarity,
may we seek a vision
that serves all beings, may we honor
the mystery surpassing our sight,
and may we hold in our hands
the gift of good work
and bear it forth whole, as we
were borne forth by a power we praise
to this one Earth, this homeland of all we love.

--John Daniel, from Of Earth. © Lost Horse Press, 2012.

Thursday, October 21, 2021

Quiet friend who has come so far,
feel how your breathing makes more space around you.
Let this darkness be a bell tower
and you the bell. As you ring,
what batters you becomes your strength.
Move back and forth into the change.
What is it like, such intensity of pain?
If the drink is bitter, turn yourself to wine.
In this uncontainable night,
be the mystery at the crossroads of your senses,
the meaning discovered there.
And if the world has ceased to hear you,
say to the silent earth: I flow.
To the rushing water, speak: I am.

--Rainer Maria Rilke
translation by Joanna Macy
(Sonnets to Orpheus II, 29)

Saturday, October 16, 2021

 In the beginning, nothing came. In the middle, nothing stayed. In the end, nothing left. -- Milarepa

Friday, October 8, 2021

Attention--a poem for Sunday

All day, the world makes its demands. There’s so much of it, world,

begging to be noticed. Two seconds past dreaming, the cat’s there kneading
claws into my chest, a truck outside coughs, and a buzz alerts me to the newest
dispatch of love. The beginning of devotion, the poet said, and I devote myself to  

everything, I try to be
fair—to the kettle’s fussy squall, and the eggs’ expiration date, the amassed
garbage and mail in domiciliary limbo by the door, I espy the top

headlines, the top of my feed, trending topics and the occasion for today’s
irascible flock, injudiciously I devote myself to a grade-school acquaintance’s Facebook
jeremiad, the entirety of a former paramour’s mawkish engagement shoot, cringey
katzenjammer of a comments section, and then an insurgence of morning

lacquers my screen, vagary of sun, with lapidary clarity
motes glistering by the window, water illumed in a jar, I
note the branches’ meek wave, flag of the leaves, the jays jostling at the feeder like boys

obvious in their need to be seen, the squirrels’ and shadows’ territorial
performances, petunias and progeny in yards vibrant as advertisements, even the sky turning
quintessentially bluer when observed—but I can’t keep up, my own body

raucous for acknowledgment, pruritic and palpitating, frenetic, ultrawhelmed
sensorium, my self  

taxed with being a self, brimming with living’s rowdy mechanics and disruptions
unremitting, a thought flits by, then another (an unpaid bill, a jingle’s tenacious refrain)—and,
votary of the sublunary, the proximate, any moment’s evanescent

welter, I attend, as best I can, neophytic  
exalter of the ordinary and all-around, henotheist  
yielding to the most persuasive god, the most recent, to each thing I say Yes? Yes!—
zealot of whatever calls me next.

--Leila Chatti
Leila Chatti is the author of the poetry collection Deluge and the chapbooks Ebb and Tunsiya/Amrikiya.

Monday, September 6, 2021

Famous

The river is famous to the fish.
The loud voice is famous to silence,   
which knew it would inherit the earth   
before anybody said so.   
The cat sleeping on the fence is famous to the birds   
watching him from the birdhouse.   
The tear is famous, briefly, to the cheek.   
The idea you carry close to your bosom   
is famous to your bosom.   
The boot is famous to the earth,   
more famous than the dress shoe,   
which is famous only to floors.
The bent photograph is famous to the one who carries it   
and not at all famous to the one who is pictured.   
I want to be famous to shuffling men   
who smile while crossing streets,   
sticky children in grocery lines,   
famous as the one who smiled back.
I want to be famous in the way a pulley is famous,   
or a buttonhole, not because it did anything spectacular,   
but because it never forgot what it could do.

-- Naomi Shihab Nye

Fall

And every year there is a brief, startling moment
When we pause in the middle of a long walk home and
Suddenly feel something invisible and weightless
Touching our shoulders, sweeping down from the air:
It is the autumn wind pressing against our bodies;
It is the changing light of fall falling on us.

- Edward Hirsch, closing lines to “Fall,” The Living Fire: New and Selected Poems, 1975-2010 

Monday, August 23, 2021

my brain and
heart divorced
a decade ago
over who was
to blame about
how big of a mess
I have become.
eventually,
they couldn't be 
in the same room
with each other.
now my head and heart 
share custody of me.
I stay with my brain 
during the week
and my heart 
gets me on weekends.
they never speak to one another
    - instead, they give me
the same note to pass
to each other every week:
"This is all your fault!"
on Sundays
my heart complains
about how my 
head has let me down
in the past
and on Wednesday
my head lists all
of the times my 
heart has screwed
things up for me 
in the future.
there's been a lot
of yelling - and crying
so,
    lately, I've been
spending a lot of 
time with my gut.
most nights, I sneak out of the
window in my ribcage
and slide down my spine
and collapse on my 
gut's plush leather chair
~ and I just sit sit sit sit
until the sun comes up.
last evening, 
my gut asked me
if I was having a hard
time being caught 
between my heart
and my head.
I nodded.
I said I didn't know
if I could live with 
either of them anymore.
"my heart is always sad about
something that happened yesterday
while my head is always worried
about something that may happen tomorrow," 
I lamented.
my gut squeezed my hand and said:
"in that case, 
you should 
go stay with your 
lungs for a while.
if you are exhausted by
your heart's obsession with
the fixed past and your mind's focus
on the uncertain future,
your lungs are the perfect place for you.
there is no yesterday in your lungs
there is no tomorrow there either
there is only now
there is only inhale
there is only exhale
there is only this moment
there is only breath
and in that breath
you can rest while your
heart and head work 
their relationship out."
this morning,
while my brain
was busy reading
tea leaves
and my heart was staring
at old photographs 
I packed a little
bag and walked
to the door of 
my lungs.
before I could even knock
she opened the door
with a smile and as
a gust of air embraced me
she said
"what took you so long?"

~ john roedel (johnroedel.com)

Dark hours

I love the dark hours of my being.
My mind deepens into them.
There I can find, as in old letters,
the days of my life, already lived,
and held like a legend, and understood.
Then the knowing comes: I can open
to another life that's wide and timeless.
So I am sometimes like a tree
rustling over a gravesite
and making real the dream
of the one its living roots
embrace:
a dream once lost
among sorrows and songs.

Rainer Maria Rilke 
Trans. Anita Burrows & Joanna Macy

I don't feel good
therefore I am bad
therefore no one loves me.
I feel good
therefore I am good
therefore everyone loves me.
I am good
You do not love me
therefore you are bad. So I do not love you.
I am good
You love me
therefore you are good. So I love you.
I am bad
You love me
therefore you are bad.

-RD Laing, Knots

First of all

First of all nothing will happen
and a little later
nothing will happen again
A family will pass by in the night
speaking of the children’s bedtime 
That will be the signal
for you to light a cigarette
Then comes a delicate moment 
when the backwoods men
gather around the table 
to discuss your way of life
Dismiss them with a glass of
cherry juice 
Your way of life has been over 
for many years 
The moonlit mountains
surround your heart 
and the Anointed One
with his bag and stick
can be picked out on a path
He is probably thinking of what
you said
in the schoolyard 100 years ago
This is a dangerous moment 
that can plunge you into silence 
for a million years 
Fortunately the sound of clarinets 
from a wandering klezmer
ensemble
drifts into the kitchen 
Allow it to distract you
from your cheerless meditation 
The refrigerator will go into
second gear 
and the cat will climb onto the 
windowsill
For no reason at all 
you will begin to cry
Then your tears will dry up
and you will ache for a companion
I will be that companion
At first nothing will happen to us
and later on
it will happen to us again

--Leonard Cohen

We're all stories in the end

 I'll be a story in your head. But that's OK: We're all stories, in the end. Just make it a good one, eh? Because it was, you know, it was the best. And the times we had, eh? Would've had. Never had. In your dreams, they'll still be there. 

--Doctor Who